30 days of truth

Ok, so after writing that last blog, I decided that I didn't like that blog challenge list. So I went & looked up the 30 Days of Truth list again. I am on Day 6 because I did Days 1-5 previously (keep scrolling!) lol. So here we go!

Day 6- Something You Hope You Never Have To Do

This is a no-brainer for any parent. I pray that I never have to bury my child. I know several people who have gone through that. I am also reading Heaven is For Real (awesome book based on a true story btw). As I was reading the first two chapters & read how these parents went through turmoil while literally watching their son wither away, I was bawling!!! I mean, I wasn't just crying, I had snot & the crying "hiccups" (you know the little pauses when you cry & can't speak normally? Those.) It made me break down because although I've seen others go through it & felt saddened for them... It still seems surreal to me. I just can't fathom it even though I've seen it happen. I don't know if that makes sense, but... That's how I feel. I pray over & for my son daily. I prayed for him before he entered this world. I thank God for trusting me with raising him & for the time he has already given me with him. I know that life is uncertain & tomorrow is not promised to anyone, not even children. I worked in the medical field for years. One of my favorite patients was a little boy who had a brain tumor. This kid had the brightest smile & the sweetest spirit! He could have complained about his situation. He could have complained about not feeling well or wanting to be "normal" & not spend all his time being pricked & prodded in a hospital for months. But he did none of that. Every time I saw him, he was happy. It made my problems seem so trivial.
I would not wish losing a child on my worst enemy. It just seems unnatural & out of order to me. This is my greatest fear. I think it's any parents greatest fear. On the other hand, I take the time now to spend with my son. I am grateful for each day with him. I want him to know that he is loved every day that he is here on this Earth.


~Jay